The Hail Mary Plan

The Toll

I work extraordinarily hard to make ends meet, pay my bills on time and maintain good credit. I have had some success in the acting arena, hosting a national show and doing guest spots on T.V., my last project was a movie my boyfriend Matthew wrote starring Frank Langella… but that was two years ago. I have been in a slump since then, reevaluating what being in this acting business means and what I would like my life to mean in general.

To support myself I’ve spent the last three years as a waitress in a smoky BBQ restaurant (yes I am a non-smoking vegetarian). I am also a director for an afterschool drama program, work as a camp counselor during the summer and am a personal assistant for an acting coach. I can’t work any harder than I do and there is no end in sight.

But the emotional toll is the worst. I have expressed my anger, fear,

betrayal and pain over the way she has failed to keep our agreement

— at the rate she is going this debt will be paid off in thirty years — and still nothing changes. My family has been going through some hard times as well: my mother had a heart attack in March (she has recovered, thank god) and my brother’s first child was born just days later (he was recently laid off from his job) and I can’t afford to visit them in Texas. I am emotionally bankrupt from the stress and strain of carrying this financial burden.

"Breaking the Fifth" with Frank Langella